bienvenidos a calzoncillos, stephanie

Ann James
2 min readAug 16, 2022


scene: mrs. jackson, an elderly neighbor, and ana, la madre de carrie ann, stephanie, and the recently departed katie, are on their hands and knees at the holy fence.

mrs. jackson: i bet you thought number 6 would be sexy, right? that’s why you peekin in de fence. i see you, Patrick Eades.

abuelita: when mija found you, you were solamente un unknown writer, less than 100 followers. now, look at you, señor chacho. 192.

mrs. jackson: i tol’ ana’s girls ta pay you no never mind —

carrie ann steps out into the yard.

carrie ann: — mama. mrs. jackson. what are you doing on the rocks?

mrs. jackson: we jus’ peekin’ back at the mean, ol’ aussie. you know how much he chargin’ you for his scooby to work here?

carrie ann: room and board. that’s it. we gonna be okie dokie. and he’s sorry he killed katie.

mrs. jackson: girl, can you help you mama and me offa the rocks. me knee’s all busted up from helpin’ you all bury the mayor.

(to be cont’d) note to self, send friend link to mayor.

A Scene from “Rain Forest Jim.”

Dave has met several working girls at Georgia’s Elite, a brothel in Mound House, Nevada. He’s friendly with all of them and vice versa. He’s in love with Celeste, who’s been missing for a month, and in lust with April, who is moving to Oregon.

Madam Georgia has sent Dave to take a mustang (a horse she adopted for April) to April’s room at the Atlantis, where she is contemplating her options. Of course, he cannae take the horse to the room. It’s in a horse trailer. The horse is in the horse trailer, the room is not. Ingles es una lengua muy confudido parami. Dave is a driver for Madam Georgia . This is years before she hired Smillew, aka, miles chauffer.

After playing phone tag, Dave has caught up with April while she is buying a classic ’67 Mustang at a Reno dealership.

this is much easier to read if you have the book. it’s not on amajohn.
you can turn your monitor/screen back to its normal position to read these 2 pages.


Ann James

Her writing muse lurks in the volcanic hills amidst mustangs, marmots and jackalopes. While hiking with her dogs, Ann stumbles upon stories of dark humor.